This One's for the Girls

Fasting and Humility

At present, there are fifteen situations going on in my church that I am either sad or burdened about.  I know it may seem unusual to know that there are fifteen, but it occurred to me the other day that there were so many prayer burdens pressing upon my heart, that I ought to count them all.   On top of all of those concerns is the added burden that my prayer life hasn't produced the results that I've been wanting; namely for all of these burdens to be "fixed" or rectified.

I keep meditating on the verse:  "God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble."   I need a lot of grace and so I've been thinking about praying for humility.  I say "thinking about" because I worry that a prayer for humility will result in a chain of bad circumstances or events brought to me by God in order to produce that humility.  And I feel that I run into enough of these without praying for more of them.  (That line of thinking is probably the proof that I need a lot more humility.)

And so then my my mind turns to wondering if I can ask God to make me humble with a  caveat: that the humility would come without trials or testing.  And then my mind turns to fasting.  It seems to me that fasting would be a way to humble oneself on purpose.  My husband has fasted off and on over the years, but the truth is that I've heard very little teaching on the subject and so I wonder about the hows and whys of this little talked about discipline and then I stumbled onto Bill Bright's website about fasting.

But as for me, when they were sick,
         My clothing was sackcloth; 
         I humbled myself with fasting; 
         And my prayer would return to my own heart.
         Psalm 35:13

I'm pretty sure that this should be a regular part of my life.  And so--  these fifteen things that are weighing me down will be the impetus for a new discipline in my life.   May God pour His grace out on me.

Sovereign Grace Music

I don't like a lot of contemporary Christian music.  There.  I said it.

Being the music person that I am, I've always had an eclectic taste in music--  I enjoy everything from country to jazz.  If you peruse my CD collection you'll find everything from Rascal Flatts to Michael Buble.  But I've always wanted the main diet of music that I'm feeding my children (and myself) to be something that would turn our thoughts toward God.  I grew up on the likes of Amy Grant, Michael W. Smith and Keith Green.  Throughout college, I got turned on to Twila Paris and Rich Mullins.  But after that, the stuff on Christian radio wasn't doing a lot for me.   I nearly drove off of the road the first time I heard Scot Underwood's You are God.  "You...  You are...  You are God... You are God, GOD, GOD...  You...  You are...  You are God... You are God, GOD, GOD!!"    Just a little lyrical creativity, people.  Puh-leeze.

So, I have been rejoicing with great joy ever since I discovered Sovereign Grace Music.  It started at John Piper's  Conference for pastors this past February, when I decided that I was going to write down the name of every song and composer that I saw flashed up on the big screen.  The worship is such a big part of why I love Piper's conference, and I was determined to try to find some of the music to take home with us this year.  Eventually, I discovered that much of the music they use is composed by the good folks over at Sovereign Grace Music.  So far, I've purchased Valley of Vision, Awesome God (which is for kids, but I am enjoying it as much or more than the kids are) and  Worship God Live.  They're all fantastic!  (And very reasonably priced!  They even offer accompaniment tracks for $3 each.  How generous is that??)

The lyrics are Scripture saturated and God-centered and it is all musically interesting.  I don't get a kick-back from this post--  I just really want to encourage all of you to go and check out the great music.  You won't be sorry that you did.

Choosing a Church-- Deal Breakers

Recently, a friend of mine posed the question:  "What are valid expectations to have for a church home?"

In trying to further describe her situation, she went on to say:

Now, don't get me wrong.  I love this little body of believers.  I love to pray for them.  They are precious people.  I love the pastor who is a wonderful expositional teacher and preacher.  But, there is no vision, no drive, no passion.  While we love the proximity of this church, love the sweet spirit of the congregation and the teaching of the pastor, there just seems to be something missing.  I feel quite shallow in describing our little church this way.  I keep telling myself that sound teaching should really be enough.  Shouldn't it?  Are my expectations out of whack?

Coming from a pastor’s family's perspective, Spencer and I have never been through the process of just "joining a church."  We always come to a church with the mindset that we’ll "meet them where they're at...help them change what needs changing...and help them fix what needs fixing--  even if it takes years.  But "What if…"  I wonder.  What if we were allowed to be as choosy as the typical lay person.  What would be our “deal breakers?” 

So, in an effort to offer a little advice for my friend, here is the list I’ve come up with:

1.  A Sound Pulpit--   For Spencer and me, this means expositional preaching and sound doctrine. Expositional preaching is preaching which expounds what Scripture says in a particular passage, carefully explaining its meaning and applying it to the congregation.  It is preaching that takes the point of the text as the point of the sermon. I could never bear to sit under a pastor who jumped from topic to topic each week. And Heaven forbid I had to sit under a pastor who read a passage of Scripture and then promptly closed his Bible to share humorous and touching anecdotes from his own life in twenty minutes or less. (Yes, I really read that last sentence as an advertisement for a nearby church!!)

2.  A church that believes in Lordship Salvation-- (rather than "Easy Believism.")   Praying “the Sinner’s Prayer” has become the Southern Baptist mantra. Salvation is not the result of a magic prayer-- it is a transformation that takes place in the life of a repentant sinner who commits to following Jesus Christ. True salvation is evidenced in FRUIT. If you bear oranges, you are not an apple tree. You are an orange tree. In the same way, a truly born again believer will bear good works. (James 2:18-19)

3.  A church with a heart for REAL evangelism--  For us, that means that people (by and large) have a burning heart to win the lost. However, it does not mean they are to try and cater to the culture to do so. As somebody once says, “What you win them by is what you win them to.” Seeker methods such as fire-engine baptistries and “If you get 1,000 people here this Sunday, we’ll bring a horse down the aisle!” are the sad result of a wrong view of evangelism and we would probably think twice before joining any church that used those kinds of methods. On the other hand, we are saddened by a cold hearted church where no one is doing anything to reach the lost! When no one in the church is willing to join the pastor for mid-week visitation to share the Gospel-- that would be a red flag that we didn’t belong at that church. When the people of the church are not opening their homes and sharing meals with their lost neighbors and friends, that would be a sure sign of a cold church too and we would think twice before joining.

4.  A Biblical Understanding of Church Membership-- Over the years, we have realized that many, many, many people view church membership as a privilege or a status symbol rather than a responsibility. This is evidenced by little Bertha Mae who has lived in Texas for the last twenty years but kept her church membership at her home church back in Arkansas.  (I guess she didn't realize that  she was supposed to transfer her letter and plug into  a local body for the kingdom of God!)   

5.  A Church that practices Church Discipline-- As John MacArthur said, “A church that doesn’t practice church discipline isn’t a true church.” How can you say that a church loves it’s sheep if it’s not willing to chase after the straying ones?  Love demands discipline.  (Matthew 18)

6.  A Church that is Committed to Discipleship and Spiritual Growth-- My husband grew up in a church and the only sermon he heard, week after week after week was “Get Saved, Get Saved, Get Saved.” As a result, by the time he reached the University of Arkansas, he was a weak and struggling Christian.  It wasn't until he met up with the Navigators and came under one-on-one discipleship that he started flourishing as a Christian. Spencer and I are committed to this practice and are committed to always having at least one or two couples we are personally discipling. If we were lay people looking for a church, we would want to see this kind of commitment from the leadership of the church and hopefully, the entire congregation!

7.  A Plurality of Elders-- I've been a Baptist all of my life, so I'm allowed to pick on them.  :)  The Baptists suffer because they have discarded this teaching on Biblical church leadership and expect one man (the pastor) to lead the church all by himself. (Well, actually, most don’t expect him to really "lead" at all. They expect the congregation to lead through a majority vote, at the monthly business meeting.)  This kind of thinking has paralyzed many a Baptist church.  We are very thankful for groups like the Baptist Founders who are encouraging Southern Baptists to return to their historic, Biblical roots.

8.  God-Centered, Affectionate, Lavish, Charismatic Worship-- We would desire a worship service led by a worship pastor who led us to worship in this way. Christ shed his blood for us. How can people not be lavish in their praise?  CLAP YOUR HANDS, all you peoples!  SHOUT TO GOD with a voice of triumph!  (Psalm 47:1),   LIFT UP YOUR HANDS in the sanctuary and bless the Lord.  (Psalm 134:2) 

Well, I'm sure I've left something out.  But there they are--  eight deal breakers that would play into the decision making process of joining a church if we were lay people searching for a church.  After all of that, I know we would approach the pastor and say, "What is your vision?  How could we help you fulfill that vision?"  The answers to those questions would be considered somewhat diagnostic and would help us determine whether or not God was leading us to join that church.

Deal breakers.  I've listed a few.  What are yours?

Don't Laugh-- I'm Just Being Pragmatic

Yesterday I spoke to a small gathering of ladies in our church.  Christians and Books--  the Importance of the Written Word.  (And then I did book reviews on the four books I mentioned in my last post.)  I shared a few  ideas and tried to make the case for reading over other less worthy uses of our time.    One of which was that if a person would spend only fifteen minutes per day reading, that would calculate into twenty books per year or one-thousand books in a lifetime.  If we could only tear ourselves away from the darn television.

We are now living in a generation who would like a fit body,
but are quite content with a fat mind.
~Paul Guiness

Still--young moms, myself included, sometimes have trouble eeking out even a scant fifteen minutes a day.   One mom said to me, "The only books I get to read each are Dr. Seuss."  And I can relate to that.  I'm pretty sure that I have I am a Bunny memorized.  Seriously.  (Hi.  I am a bunny. My name is Nicholas. I live in a hollow tree.  Would you like for me to continue??) 

So, the number one question that I got hit with after I gave my talk yesterday was:  "How do you find time to read so many books?"    Mostly at night, in the ten minutes between the time my head hits the pillow and before I fall asleep.  But when I got home, I really got to thinking about my reading habits and how I plow through books like I do.  I came up with a little list and here it is.  Don't laugh at some of my suggestions.  After all, a mom's got to do what a mom's got to do.

1.  At night before I fall asleep.  But I already told you that.
2.  For at least 10 minutes while I'm in the bathtub each morning.  Everyone assumes I'm bathing and no one interrupts me.
3.  I keep a book on the back of the toilet.  Again--  everyone assumes...
4.  I always take a book in the car with me.  If I am picking a child up from an activity, I inevitably have to wait for him or her for at least five minutes.   If we're driving into the city, sometimes Spencer will ask for me to read aloud to him.  Then we get the double blessing of being able to discuss what I'm reading!  (Sometimes it's one of his books I read to him.)  Family trips are a great time to take along a book.  We will often read fiction on a family trip.
5.  Doctor's offices.  Enough said.

Basically, as you can see from the list, nearly all of my reading time is "stolen time."  I don't ever sit around during the day and read.  Destructo-baby leaves no time for sitting on one's haunches.  Besides, there's homeschooling and laundry to do.  You know the routine.  But even in this busy season of life, I desire to grow and stretch my mind.  And so I take what I can get.  And you should too.

Inspired

Our family went on a little overnight excursion this weekend. We had parent-teacher conferences up at the school on Thursday and then school was let out for Friday-- so we surprised the kids by having the van all packed up and whisking them away right after meeting with their teachers and picking up their grade cards. Nothing does the heart good like a little family bonding over an indoor pool and Domino’s pizza delivered to your hotel room.

And, of course, a history lesson. No field trip family trip would be complete without a little education. It’s just the Ray Way.

Recently, Spencer heard that Winston Churchill’s library was being housed at the nearby Westminster College.   Since he had just finished the second volume of The Last Lion, (a Christmas gift purchased for him by his darling wife,) it seemed only fitting to follow up on the reading with a little visit to his library. We didn’t know what a treat we were in for. When we got there today, we discovered not only a library, but a 4-million dollar museum on his life and accomplishments.  What was meant to be a little one hour stint, turned into a three hour perusal of rooms and rooms of letters, memoirs and videos they had on file there.

 I loved learning more about the life of Winston Churchill.  He lived his life with such purpose and devotion for the good of Britain and for the world. I don’t even know if he was a Christian or not-- (I read today that he rarely went to church. When he was approached about this, he said he was not a "pillar of the church" but a "buttress."  He supported it from the outside.) But his life story is amazing and it inspired me to work as hard for the Kingdom of God as Churchill did for Britain
and for freedom around the world.

Lately, our family has been viewing the Don’t Waste Your Life videos for our family devotions and as I was thinking on Churchill today, I kept hearing Piper’s voice saying:

Only one life, ‘twill soon be past
Only what’s done for Christ will last.

Although I am just the wife of small-town, Baptist preacher, and not the wife of a world famous Prime Minister who helped defeat a tyrannical monster-- I felt privileged today to be working for the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords. With the cross of Christ before me and the world behind me, I will continue to engage in the battle against Satan, the ultimate tyrannical monster.

And hopefully, by God's grace,  I won’t WASTE MY LIFE.

Reading the Bible in a Year

For the last few years, I've used the Bible reading plan in the back of my MacArthur Study Bible.  But recently, I've found a new plan that I like better.  It's broken up into four daily readings (Old Testament, Psalms, and 2 New Testament Readings.)  You can print it out here and cut the printed page into four bookmarks--one for each section in your Bible.

Safety 1st???

If you're in the market for a carseat, DO NOT buy one from Safety 1st.  We purchased this one for our Julianna about a year ago.  At the age of 19 months, Julianna could UNBUCKLE HERSELF  by pushing the little button the harness strap of her Safety 1st carseat. 

I have emailed Safety 1st twice now but they have not even granted me the courtesy of a reply.

So, in order to really pick up the Google traffic, let me just say:

Don't buy from Safety 1st.
Don't buy from Safety 1st.
Don't buy from Safety 1st.
Don't buy from Safety 1st.
Don't buy from Safety 1st.

Why?   Because Safety 1st doesn't put safety, 1st. 

Thoughts Over Tea

Boomama is hosting a Labor Day Link Love Extravaganza.  To participate, one needs only to share one of their favorite posts and then sign up with her Mr. Linky thingy.  (If you've never read Boomama before,  she is so sweet and funny and you really need to go on over there and browse through her archives.)  Anyway, her idea really works for me this weekend since my brain has been totally fried trying to get into the school groove and I have no bloggity goodness to share with anyone.   I originally wrote this post back in March at my old Blogger site, but I'm reposting it here because darned ole' Blogger removed all paragraph separations and indentions and everything over at the  old Blogger  site is sooo unreadable now.  (Which is why I moved over to Typepad in the first place...)

Happy Labor Day Weekend, everyone.  Hope you get a chance to sit down and...

enjoy a glass of tea!

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Every Tuesday afternoon after knitting class, Ava and I stop at the Cyber Stop to get a Krispy Kreme donut and a drink.   (The Cyber Stop is a full-service gas station featuring FREE wireless?!? I’m not sure WHO it is that has time to surf the web while they’re filling up.)

Anyway--Ava always gets a soda and I get my all time favorite convenience-store drink: Lipton sweet ice-tea.  I love that stuff.!  Totally addicted.    When I drink it, I’m always thrown back to southern Arkansas where the folks really know how to make it.    Sometimes I think of Father Tim and Cynthia from my favorite books: The Mitford Series.  (Those books are just like old friends to me and I’ve read the entire series no less than three times.)   Jan Karon has also written the Mitford Kitchen Reader that includes Father Tim’s Mother’s Tea recipe.  (*see recipe & Kitchen Reader excerpt below)   Mmm. MMM!

Funny that I love sweet tea so much.   I grew up drinking the instant kind and it never had sugar mixed in! I always drank it without batting an eye until I met my southern-boy husband.   The first time he ever tasted the instant stuff he nearly puked. But of course, being the genteel, southern boy that he is, he was always the picture of graciousness and kindness and never complained to his hostess future-mother-in-law.    However, after we got married, he sweetly informed me of a better way.    And of course, it was!    When I grew up, I rejected the bitter, instant tea— but I didn’t reject everything that my mother cooked.   She made a lot of things well and I still use some of those recipes in my cooking today.   Her salmon patty recipe is awesome and I still love her crock pot roast.   Today as I was drinking the tea, I thought of other things that I grew up with but later rejected.

For instance, I grew up in a church that went crazy over the Bill Gothard movement.   At the time, I was growing spiritually like a weed.   I was very zealous in my love for the Lord (as I hope that I still am) and embraced the movement completely because the people at my church whom I admired the most embraced it.    As I grew and especially after I met my husband, I began to see many things within that movement that weren’t completely biblical and even harmful to true, healthy spiritual growth.   I look back at those years and shake my head at some of the things that I thought and believed.   Twenty years later, I’ve thrown out a lot of those beliefs just as I’ve pitched the instant iced-tea.   No good.    Yuck.  But what I don’t throw out is the love that I had for the Lord or the zeal that I had to follow Him with my whole heart.   And (hopefully) I don’t make fun of the people I encounter who are at that same sort of spot in their own spiritual walk. I may try to introduce the "better recipes," but I don’t belittle these folks who are trying to live out their love for the Lord in the best way that they know at the moment.  Hopefully, I’ll be like my sweet husband when he was sitting at my mother’s kitchen table. Kind and gracious.

Many of us were raised in a certain tradition or with certain ideologies.   Eventually though, we grow up, go to college or change churches and get exposed to opposing thoughts and ideas.   This can be and often is a good thing.   As our thinking is challenged, we start to dig into the Scriptures for ourselves and develop independent, autonomous ideas.   Hopefully, though, we don’t throw the baby out with the bath water.   And of course, we never reject the one thing that should forever be our constant: God's Word.   Just some random thoughts I had today over a glass of iced-tea.   Cheers.
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*“Man alive! What’s this?” “It’s my new iced tea recipe,” said his wife. “Do you like it?” He raised his glass in a salute. “It’s the best I ever tasted. I didn’t know you could do this.” “I didn’t, either. I never knew how to make good iced tea. So, with our parish party coming up, I asked the Lord to give me the perfect recipe.” “That’s the spirit!” “Do you honestly like it?” “I never tasted better!” he exclaimed, stealing no thunder from his mother, whose tea represented the southern idea—heavy on sugar, and blasted with the juice of fresh lemons. “I woke up yesterday morning and was bursting with all these new ideas about tea. It was very exciting.” “Hmm,” he said, gulping draughts of the cold, fruity liquid. “Tropical. Exotic.” He swigged it down to the last drop. “Two thumbs up,” he said. “I’m not sure everybody would understand where the recipe came from. She shrugged. “If He gave William Blake those drawings, why couldn’t He give me a simple tea recipe?” “Good point. What’s in it?” “I can’t tell you.” “You can’t tell me?” “No, darling, I’ve decided to do something very southern—which is to possess at least one secret recipe.” She looked pleased with herself. “But you can tell me.” “Not on your life!” “Why not? I’m your husband!” “Some well-intentioned parishioner would yank it out of you just like that.” She snapped her fingers. “No!” “Yes. And then I’d be in the same boat with poor Esther, whose once-secret orange Marmalade cake recipe is circulating through Mitford like a virus.” “If that’s the way you feel,” he said, slightly miffed.  -A New Song, Chapter nine

FATHER TIM’S MOTHER’S TEA
2 large lemons
3 Lipton family-size teabags, tags removed
1 ¼ cups granulated sugar

Squeeze the lemons into a small bowl, chill the juice, and reserve the skins. Place the teabags and reserved lemon hulls into a large pottery or glass pitcher and our in 2 cups of cold water. Bring a kettle with 4 cups water to a rolling boil. Pour the boiling water over the teabags and cover the pitcher with a small plate. Steep for 10 minutes, then remove the teabags and lemon skins. Add the sugar and lemon juice and stir until the sugar is dissolved. Add 3 more cups of cold water. Serve over ice and garnished with a fresh lemon slice.  Enjoy!

Bible Saturated

Today I was privileged to attend a mini-conference on teaching children's Sunday School at our church.  We bought the DVD of the Bethlehem Baptist's Children's Conference and viewed them together in our fellowship hall.  Oh, what a heart for God those people have.  I was so inspired both as a Sunday School teacher and as a parent to be more Bible-saturated.  Pastor David Michael used an object lesson (since all good children's teachers use object lessons, right?)  He took a sponge and dipped it in a pail of water.   As he raised it out of the bucket, it was so saturated with water that it was dripping back into the bucket.  He said, "This is how our lives should be--so saturated with the Word of God that we can't help but ooze and drip with it."

He left us with this Word: 

Weak doctrine = Weak faith = Weak Christians

So read the Word, sisters.  Read it, memorize it, talk about it, think about it, obey it.

Drip with it.

Give ear, O my people, to my law; which we have heard and known...And our fathers have told us.
We will not hide them from their children, Telling to the generation to come the praises of the LORD, And His strength and His wonderful works that He has done.   ~Psalm 78:3-4

Appearances

The first meal I ever made for my new husband was deep-fried chicken.  The only thing I knew how to cook before we were married was scrambled eggs, chocolate chip cookies and a few other things on about that same skill level.  But I was determined to fry us up a pan of chicken that would rival the Colonel's and so I reached for my Fannie Farmer Cookbook and went to work.

I slaved away all afternoon and when Cole walked in the door from a long day of classes, I presented to him a beautiful platter of golden, pan-fried chicken with homemade mashed potatoes and chicken gravy.  The kitchen was  a disaster, but the table looked great!   He was impressed!   Being a boy who grew up eating all kinds of delicious dishes cooked by his southern-belle mama, he had worried that I might not provide the kind of meals to which he had grown accustomed.   The beautiful plate of chicken put his worries to rest.

He sat down, praised the beautifully prepared table and blessed the food.   Next, we took our napkins, covered our laps and picked up our forks to "dig in."  That's when I realized I had missed one tiny little detail.  The recipe had expressly said to COVER the chicken with a lid while it fried in the grease for twenty minutes.  Somehow, though,  I had missed that little instruction and so while it fried up to be beautiful and  golden on the outside, on the inside it was a bloody mess.

Things weren't what they appeared.

Things aren't always what they appear to be, are they?   Earlier this evening, I was peeling a small bowl of peaches reserved for a pie I that intend to bake for weekend company.  (My culinary skills have come a long way since the plate of bloody chicken.)  Those peaches were so ripe and juicy and just pie perfect, really.  As I got to the bottom of the peach pile, I picked up what looked like a beautiful one and  slipped my knife across the fuzzy peel.  It was only after I got into the meat of the peach that I realized it had gone bad--completely rancid.  I threw it out and  reached f or another. 

Things weren't  as they appeared.

How about you?  Are you what you appear to be?   Sometimes we're tempted to act like something we're not, aren't we?  We're tempted to be a certain way around "the preacher" or "that certain family."  Sometimes we forget that God is never fooled no matter who else we're fooling because He can look on our heart.

I may not be everything you expect me to be--but I do try to be the real deal. 

An open book.

Genuine.   

My kids aren't perfect.  My marriage isn't perfect.   My life isn't perfect.   Did you know that I forgot to take my Bible to church last Sunday?  (And I'm the pastor's wife for crying out loud!)  I just try to live out my faith and my passion for God in the best way I that I know, and then I try to make sure that you know WHO IT IS to whom I turn  when I'm struggling.  I don't ever want to "fake it" because if you think my life is picture perfect, my life isn't a true picture of grace is it?

So--don't "fake it 'til you make it."  Ask God to fill your heart with genuine love and passion for Him and ask the Body of Christ for help in the process. 

"Do not look at his appearance or at his physical stature, because I have refused him. For the LORD does not see as man sees; for man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.”      I Samuel 16:7